As a psychotherapist, a psychologist in private practice, I find that although we seem to live in a "psychologically-minded" society, there continues to exist a great deal of confusion about psychology and psychotherapy. This sometimes inhibits people from seeking out help that could result in reducing their experience of stress or suffering, and of more easily achieving their goals in life. Often people don't clearly have a sense of what they would consult a psychologist for, or why, or when. Sometimes there is simply a lack of knowledge about it; sometimes there is a sense, a belief, that "you have to be really mentally ill" or have a diagnosable psychiatric disorder, to consult a psychologist. There also still seems to be a stigma attached to seeking psychotherapy, or consulting a psychologist. Some people are conflicted about the idea because they feel that they "should be able to cope" on their own, that it would be a sign of weakness, to seek help.

All of this is very unfortunate. I don’t subscribe to a medical model when it comes to psychology, but I will use a medical analogy here. There is no need to consult a medical doctor for a common cold. We know what it is, we know how to treat it at home, and we know to expect that it will pass within a few days or a week. We also know that depending on our lifestyles, our general health and how we take care of ourselves – or not – with regards to things like stress, diet, rest, and exercise, we will be more or less resistant to the cold virus. On the other hand, if we have cold symptoms that do not diminish after a week, and especially if they seem to get worse or enter into a chronic state despite doing everything we know how to do to treat colds, then it makes sense to call on a medical professional – whether a doctor of medicine, naturopathy or homoeopathy - to investigate whether it is something more serious than a cold, or whether our immune system is compromised and needs strengthening to fight the virus. Maybe we also need to learn some new dietary or lifestyle habits that will make us healthier and our immune systems stronger.

The same thing is true with psychology. Sometimes we find that despite doing all the things we know how to do in order to resolve a difficult situation, or to deal with stressful thoughts, or to manage distressing feelings, we are unable to feel better. Sometimes our patterns of thinking, our patterns of reaction, and our understanding about ourselves and our situations fail to help us achieve our goals or function as we desire. Then it makes sense to consult a professional who can help us better understand what is going on, and to learn different, more effective ways of thinking and responding to a situation that lead to more satisfactory results.

Many people comment to me that they don't know how I do the work that I do, how "it must be awful to listen to people's sad stories… people’s pain… people complaining" all day, every day. In fact, I love my work. Every day, people who have overcome some degree of stigma about asking for help, or about going to see a mental health professional, come into my office seeking growth and freedom. That growth may be simply in being willing to learn and try something new, rather than continuing the same old patterns that don't work. It may be as simple as learning how to communicate differently to have a more satisfying relationship with their spouse, or it may be as profound as healing a childhood trauma so that it no longer victimizes them, and they can more fully engage enjoying their lives and feeling freedom in following their paths on this journey of life.

Every day in my work, I witness and I help people on their journeys, as they take risks, open up, dare to want something better for themselves, and choose to let go of feelings, thoughts or habits of behaviour that get in the way of their happiness and of living a fulfilling life. Every day in my work I witness and help people engage in a process, and make changes, that lead them to feel more empowered to live their lives as they would like. This is what consulting psychologist or a psychotherapist is about; this is why I love my work.